I wrote my blog in the morning yesterday, telling myself that pre-planning is the way to go, as it keeps me accountable and I don't have to worry about what I am going to eat. Which is totally true! And has been helping me big time. But it doesn't end up being a true reflection of my day, which is sort of cheating.
I tried to drink my protein snack but it was JUST AWFUL! So I picked up a protein bar and an Ice Break, because coffee during the day is still making me queasy. Then I remembered that Ice Breaks have more calories than my protein bar, so I chucked out the half I had left. I was okay energy-wise for most of the day. I think the combo of extra protein (almonds) with fruit helped. I started to peter out at around 3:30, which I think is because I was bored senseless, so I went in to the disabled toilet and did a round of jumping jacks to wake up!
I found out from S!mm Vicious (ENRG) that the reason I've been feeling so lousy is because my body is going through a detox. Not that I was hugely toxic before, but 'going clean' means that my body is supposedly flushing everything else out. S!mm did the Derbalife program, which I am starting on today. It's pretty much Herbalife with a different name. I know, some people freak out when they see the word "Herbalife", but it seems totally legit so far, and I have been wanting a totally structured approach to nutrition for ATHLETES for ages. And that's exactly what this is, with some derby flavour. I plan to do 2 shakes a day, plus one meal and two snacks, until I drop my tummy, which is probably a total of 12 weeks, then I will most likely drop back to 1 shake a day, just like I have been doing, only with a constant hooked-in support line, and additional supplements to help me reach my athletic goals. And who knows, maybe I will fall completely in love with it, like Krissy, and do 2 shakes all the time and be a crazy devotee and wear t-shirts and become a coach. I will only know through trying.
On to the real cheating. As you now know, I start Derbalife today (Thursday 10th of Feb 2011). And as you also know, failing to plan is planning to fail. So I came home from training, completely dog-ass tired, and didn't have a sufficient food plan, or food in the cupboard, to fill up before bed. So I had some pb on rye. Yum, and acceptable. Then, I had a trail mix bar. Also yum, and, singularly, aacceptable. Then I had a piece of rye with Vegemite and cheese. And then I had about 12 spoonfuls of ice cream. It was like I opened Pandora's box. I don't feel awful for doing it today, I think I just needed to recognise my failure, and own up to it. But it certainly wasn't the best move I've ever made. Especially after sweating out all the toxins and good stuff at training. I suppose some feelings of inadequacy from training helped. It's pretty silly: my number-one competitor (in my mind) skated harder and faster than me; she did more push-ups, on her toes, than me; and she skated beautifully. Then she went and threw up and had to go home because she hadn't eaten properly (sound familiar?) and she was super wiped out. I feel terrible for her, really I do, especially now that I've been there and done that, I know how suckey it is. But it's really, really hard to shake the feeling that you can't even match up to your best competition on their worst day. And yes, even if it WAS your second training back where you were allowed to go all out after an injury! I do know that it's silly to feel this way, but I do.
Anyway, back to food, baby did a bad, bad thing, very close to my leaving date (15 DAYS!!) and I will pay for it mentally today. I have issues with letting things go. But I promise you, blog, and faithful reader, that it will only make me more determined to work faster, skate harder, and eat better, to shave off the last few kilos and look hotter in my hotpants in the U S of A!
Sent with love from my DodgeBerry
you already look hot in your hot pants!! :D
ReplyDelete